Today would of been my mommies birthday. I miss her terribly. I am sad. I wish she was here. I have a huge empty spot in my heart. I have so much in my life she has not been here for in the last 16 months. I need her advice and wisdom. I struggle to do the right thing everyday. She was a rock in my life in the last 3 years of turmoil. She gave me infinite guidance and wisdom. She helped me when my life was at some of its lowest points. She kept me sane when my entire life fell apart. I have never shared the incredible mess my life has been for the last few years and the mess it still is. My mom supported me emotionally while my husband left our marriage and abandoned me with nothing but tears and extreme hurt. My mom stood by me even when she knew I was being stupid and only acting in pain. I miss her. I will miss her the rest of my life. A parent will love you regardless of your mistakes. They always love you but may not love your choices. It has taken me a long time and a lot of learning to get this lesson and when I learned it my mom was gone. Her passing has affect me greatly and changed my life. I am still a work in progress. What I will be on the other side ?? I do not know. I know I miss my mom terribly. I know I wish I could have one last phone call with her.

Yes I am sad at my mothers passing but I know she is no longer in pain or ill. I hope she is finally happy.  I hope she enjoys her birthday.  I hope she is enjoying a peanut butter, jelly , and tomato sandwich.

I love you Mom.